Parents who do not rule their roost have a fool for a master. Yes I know, we want our children to be happy, and independent, and have better lives than we did. So then lead. Just like self-discipline is not self taught, so a child must be guided and taught. Yes children have their own personalities, but they are also self-centered.
Willful disobedience is not a sign of intelligence. It is a sign of who is in charge. We brought them into this world, now let’s give them a chance by molding them into responsible citizens. Children who cannot govern themselves will eventually, if not sooner, find themselves being governed more and more. Parents must lead.